I don't believe I've gone into detail about the 300 Incident. Please allow me to backtrack and give the following account.
Just prior to Mardi Gras, James (unofficial roommate and all around cool guy) asked me to order him a sword for his Princess Bride costume for the Pal's annual parade. Here is James as Wesley; hero and princess rescuer.
James is of the opinion that banks and credit cards suck so he gave me cash and I used my ancient PayPal account to order the above really nifty sword for him. Is that a corset on the floor in the foreground? I didn't notice that before.
Anyway, the sword was ordered with only one minor difficulty; that being my need to correct my address. The vendor said fine, no problem, and we went about our business. Approximately a week later we were out running errands and came back to find a UPS notice on the door saying we'd missed a shipment. As both of us had received all our costuming bits, neither knew what it could possibly be. I went online and found that it was from an online weapons supplier different than the one his sword had been ordered from. Further, there were two packages involved weighing a total of 89 pounds.
This was intriguing! What possibly could it be? A prize? A major award? A year's supply of pet food? Who knew? At this time, it was determined that in the spirit of adventure and early Christmas we must find out. At 8pm, we arrived at the UPS office to pick up the packages. They were so huge we had to put them on a Home Depot style dolly and cram them into my Suzuki SX4 as best we could. James was so thrilled I doubt WWIII would have stopped him from getting this fabulous unknown package.
Bristling with excitement, we hauled both boxes into the house and started opening the bigger one. IT'S...another box. And another box. And another. All of these were about the same size and nondescript. Finally I saw on the inside of one of the flaps a label reading "Spartan Helms, Standard. 8 count, 2 boxes".
Around the same time, James had opened one of the the smaller containers and produced an absolutely beautiful solid brass licensed replica of the helmets worn by the soldiers in the movie 300. The helmets were functional, had leather chin straps, and a nice solid wood stand to show them off on. They also smelled like gun oil having been well-lubricated to keep a decent shine.
James was wiggling like a six-week-old puppy. I have to admit, I was rather excited as well. After looking at the invoice, it was determined that there had been a mix up when I'd updated my address with the original company. Company number 2 had accidentally assigned me my own wholesale account and sent me stuff (which had already been paid for by the people wanting it). In addition to nothing being owed and they not having my bank account information in any case, it also appeared that there were 16 sharpened Spartan swords from the same series on back order.
Oh, it was birthday, Christmas, and National Beer Day all in one when James saw that. However, after checking the company's website and discovering that each helm retailed for approximately $350 I knew there was no way we could keep this neat swag. Somebody had sent out a very costly wrong shipment to a stranger with no liability and the oversight would be quickly discovered. Not only that, my conscience wouldn't let me keep it. James pleaded not to return his windfall and so we made a deal. If a month passed and nobody found the error, he could keep his helmets.
Unsurprisingly, within a week and a half I got an e-mail from the company. The dealer knew full well I was under no obligation to return the helmets (though I would have anyway without prodding) and offered me a gift for my troubles. James was in a pout about losing his awesome helmets, believing nothing could be cooler than having enough headgear to start an army with. Plus, having gone as a Spartan for Mardi Gras some years back and pulled it off exceedingly well he felt he was entitled. Nonetheless, one gift was better than no gifts and the helmets were going back no matter what. And after I pointed out that with his new gift he could go on the offensive against invaders rather than being defensive he felt a lot better.
This week James got his prize. It's a Raptor Katana of Spiffiness, which also has its own YouTube videos that the erstwhile conqueror/anarchist had been glued to until its arrival.
I can sum up everything you need to know about this sword in one word: sharp. It makes me very nervous, especially with James leaping around my new tv with it while cackling with glee. However, it did extremely well against the outdoor shrubbery. That bush never saw it coming.
And on the subject of outdoor horticulture, we finally made the garden!
It was by far the easiest garden I've ever made. Soft ground without being mushy, only a few roots, and no rocks to speak of! Earthworms were everywhere and the soil was dark enough to resemble Michael Jackson in his early days. I used the pile of bricks that have been in the far corner of the yard as a border and the two gates that were sitting rusting as climbing trellises. The plants in progress are pickling cucumbers, Creole and Beefeater tomatoes, kidney beans, watermelon, and okra. I'm so excited! I'm going to try to put in a blackberry bush too once the new fence is put in.
I also found out that the bunch of banana trees that grow like crazy in the corner are actually meant to be there. Most banana trees around here are essentially a weed variety which don't yield much, if any, fruit. This particular set in my back corner originally came from one of the previous tenants. He was an old Cuban man who lived in the house about 30 years prior that brought the seeds/sprouts with him and let them go in the backyard. My landlord Edgar said that they were the only thing in the yard that Katrina didn't kill. Prior to the storm he had some thriving red tip photinias against the back fence that kicked the bucket but the bananas were just fine.
Now that I think about it, there may be a good reason the soil was as dark brown and rich as it was. Eww. Well, it's far too long now for anything like Hepatitis to have survived from the flooding and contaminate potential crops.
In any event, woo hoo! Yay for not starving!
Just prior to Mardi Gras, James (unofficial roommate and all around cool guy) asked me to order him a sword for his Princess Bride costume for the Pal's annual parade. Here is James as Wesley; hero and princess rescuer.
Anyway, the sword was ordered with only one minor difficulty; that being my need to correct my address. The vendor said fine, no problem, and we went about our business. Approximately a week later we were out running errands and came back to find a UPS notice on the door saying we'd missed a shipment. As both of us had received all our costuming bits, neither knew what it could possibly be. I went online and found that it was from an online weapons supplier different than the one his sword had been ordered from. Further, there were two packages involved weighing a total of 89 pounds.
This was intriguing! What possibly could it be? A prize? A major award? A year's supply of pet food? Who knew? At this time, it was determined that in the spirit of adventure and early Christmas we must find out. At 8pm, we arrived at the UPS office to pick up the packages. They were so huge we had to put them on a Home Depot style dolly and cram them into my Suzuki SX4 as best we could. James was so thrilled I doubt WWIII would have stopped him from getting this fabulous unknown package.
Bristling with excitement, we hauled both boxes into the house and started opening the bigger one. IT'S...another box. And another box. And another. All of these were about the same size and nondescript. Finally I saw on the inside of one of the flaps a label reading "Spartan Helms, Standard. 8 count, 2 boxes".
Around the same time, James had opened one of the the smaller containers and produced an absolutely beautiful solid brass licensed replica of the helmets worn by the soldiers in the movie 300. The helmets were functional, had leather chin straps, and a nice solid wood stand to show them off on. They also smelled like gun oil having been well-lubricated to keep a decent shine.
James was wiggling like a six-week-old puppy. I have to admit, I was rather excited as well. After looking at the invoice, it was determined that there had been a mix up when I'd updated my address with the original company. Company number 2 had accidentally assigned me my own wholesale account and sent me stuff (which had already been paid for by the people wanting it). In addition to nothing being owed and they not having my bank account information in any case, it also appeared that there were 16 sharpened Spartan swords from the same series on back order.
Oh, it was birthday, Christmas, and National Beer Day all in one when James saw that. However, after checking the company's website and discovering that each helm retailed for approximately $350 I knew there was no way we could keep this neat swag. Somebody had sent out a very costly wrong shipment to a stranger with no liability and the oversight would be quickly discovered. Not only that, my conscience wouldn't let me keep it. James pleaded not to return his windfall and so we made a deal. If a month passed and nobody found the error, he could keep his helmets.
Unsurprisingly, within a week and a half I got an e-mail from the company. The dealer knew full well I was under no obligation to return the helmets (though I would have anyway without prodding) and offered me a gift for my troubles. James was in a pout about losing his awesome helmets, believing nothing could be cooler than having enough headgear to start an army with. Plus, having gone as a Spartan for Mardi Gras some years back and pulled it off exceedingly well he felt he was entitled. Nonetheless, one gift was better than no gifts and the helmets were going back no matter what. And after I pointed out that with his new gift he could go on the offensive against invaders rather than being defensive he felt a lot better.
This week James got his prize. It's a Raptor Katana of Spiffiness, which also has its own YouTube videos that the erstwhile conqueror/anarchist had been glued to until its arrival.
I can sum up everything you need to know about this sword in one word: sharp. It makes me very nervous, especially with James leaping around my new tv with it while cackling with glee. However, it did extremely well against the outdoor shrubbery. That bush never saw it coming.
And on the subject of outdoor horticulture, we finally made the garden!
It was by far the easiest garden I've ever made. Soft ground without being mushy, only a few roots, and no rocks to speak of! Earthworms were everywhere and the soil was dark enough to resemble Michael Jackson in his early days. I used the pile of bricks that have been in the far corner of the yard as a border and the two gates that were sitting rusting as climbing trellises. The plants in progress are pickling cucumbers, Creole and Beefeater tomatoes, kidney beans, watermelon, and okra. I'm so excited! I'm going to try to put in a blackberry bush too once the new fence is put in.
I also found out that the bunch of banana trees that grow like crazy in the corner are actually meant to be there. Most banana trees around here are essentially a weed variety which don't yield much, if any, fruit. This particular set in my back corner originally came from one of the previous tenants. He was an old Cuban man who lived in the house about 30 years prior that brought the seeds/sprouts with him and let them go in the backyard. My landlord Edgar said that they were the only thing in the yard that Katrina didn't kill. Prior to the storm he had some thriving red tip photinias against the back fence that kicked the bucket but the bananas were just fine.
Now that I think about it, there may be a good reason the soil was as dark brown and rich as it was. Eww. Well, it's far too long now for anything like Hepatitis to have survived from the flooding and contaminate potential crops.
In any event, woo hoo! Yay for not starving!
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